Monday, May 20, 2024

5 Best Memorial Day Movies to Watch this Weekend

Memorial Day is an American holiday so I’m sorry for all the foreigners reading this article who understandably don’t care about our holidays. If that’s the case, then maybe read one of my article about international figures like Thanos or Hamilton.

Here are the best Memorial Day movies to watch this weekend. Don’t forget to hug a veteran and squeeze their face/butt cheeks and go “who’s my little cutesy wootsie veteran!”

Operation Dumbo Drop

operation dumbo drop really happened never forget

Never forget the elephant who jumped out of a plane. Let us never forget that one time when the elephant is flying out of the plane that he shit himself repeatedly at terminal velocity. Rained down a wheelbarrow’s volume of shit all over the villagers.

Hot Shots! Part Deux

Let us never forget Topper Harley shot a bunch of people and was awesome in Wall Street. Also never forget his kickboxing match where he smashes a guy’s testicles so hard they came out of his mouth. War is truly hell.

Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope

han solo is a man, not a planet

Never forget all those heroes who died shooting the Death Star to death. Most notably Jek Porkins, who was roasted like a honey glazed ham while fighting a metal death planet. Let us never forget this is the first movie website to ever make a joke about Porkins and his weight and his resemblance to a glazed hog.

Console Wars

mega man x for snes was way better than vector man for sega

Never forget all those heroes who fought in the console wars between the Super Nintendo and SEGA Genesis. Many gamers fought each other during these dark times for the right to say that Super Mario World was a way better game than Toe Jam & Earl.

Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

empire strikes back is the best

Never forget all those Rebel heroes who fought against the Galactic Empire during the Star Wars. Let us never forget how many Rebel tauntauns were crushed during the Battle of Hoth by giant walking AT-AT’s or the tauntauns that were eaten by wampas or jawas or whatever.

Thanks for reading this Cinema Listed dot com article and never forget to hug a veteran and tell them that Donkey Kong is way better than Mortal Kombat on the SEGA Genesis.

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